You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello...
We said goodbye to my Grandma Clarkson on Thursday, May 8th, 2008. She had lived a good life and it was time for us to let her go. We laid her to rest in Port Arthur, Texas on Monday, May 12th, 2008. She was my last living grandparent and I guess that marks a milestone in my life.
Murylene Clarkson was born on December 7, 1917, in Colmesneil, Texas, to Conrad and Pearl Waltrip Cook. Murylene was a loving mother and grandma to many.
Grandma Clarkson passed away on Thursday, May 8, 2008, at the age of 90 years.
She is survived by her son, Tim Clarkson and his wife Janet; daughter, Susie Miller and her husband Ward; six grandchildren; 10 great grandchildren; and other loving family members and friends. She was preceded in death by her sons, E. Allan and Bill Clarkson; and by her parents.
Visitation will be held from 4:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. on Sunday, May 11, 2008, at the Schmidt Funeral Home Chapel, in Katy. A graveside service will be held at 11:30 a.m. on Monday, May 12, 2008, at Greenlawn Memorial Park Cemetery, in Port Arthur, Texas, with her grandson, Ron Clarkson, officiating.
In lieu of flowers, the family requests memorial contributions be made to the charity of your choice.
I spent the days leading up to her passing and the funeral re-living my memories of her. Some of my earliest memories include her. The following is part of the service that I managed to perform at her graveside:
Memories of Murylene
When somebody leaves us here on this world to travel to the next, we’re left with holes that we desperately try to fill to make sense of it all. We regret that we didn’t spend enough time with that person. We regret that we didn’t tell them we loved them just one more time. We miss their physical presence and the comfort it brings to us. Over time, those feelings leave us as we begin to fill the holes in our lives with the memories of that person, both good and bad.
No doubt you have been thinking about your memories of Grandma for the past few hours, days, and weeks – but these are mine. Hopefully my memories will spark a hidden memory for you.
I remember that Grandma loved food. I think you can look around and see that she passed that love on to many of us.
I remember that she especially loved strawberries.
I remember that she loved to go to the farmer’s market to look for fresh fruits and vegetables that were in season.
I remember that she loved her ice cream – vanilla with chocolate syrup.
I remember that she didn’t like wild game – and any time you mentioned it to her she would scrunch up her nose and shake her head.
I remember that she didn’t like liver – because she used to have to sear it and serve it almost raw to a sick loved one to make them better.
I remember Grandma’s roast – cooked until it no longer resembled the red meat it once was.
I remember her cooking buttermilk pancakes.
I remember that she used to let me eat as much ice cream as I wanted – as many of you remind me still today.
I remember that Grandma loved to watch old movies and that she absolutely adored John Wayne.
I remember watching Pillow Talk for the first time at her house and developing a slight crush on Doris Day that exists even now.
I remember the countless games of Canasta with my parents and anybody who would play with her – sometimes even grandkids.
I remember her teaching me how to play solitaire and double solitaire.
I remember afghans, clothes hangers, crochet hooks and yarn.
I remember that Grandma used to go on trips with us when I was young.
I remember that on one trip all three of the kids had to sit in the backseat with Grandma.
I remember that during these trips she had a tendency to read every sign on the road with the wide-eyed wonderment of exploring something for the first time. This drove me quite mad.
I remember that I once went with her to a friend’s house near Chain O’ Lakes and I got sick from eating a snow cone. To this day, syrupy-sweet snow cones are not my favorite.
I remember her old mobile home and the trailer park she lived in.
I remember the gold fish pond and how we used to love going to see them when we got there.
I remember that her backyard always needed some maintenance and how I would always look for ways to avoid the work.
I remember that on one trip I accidentally locked the keys to the car in the trunk while unloading and feeling a certain sense of dread in telling my dad – until I remembered that we were at Grandma’s house and that she would protect me.
One of my earliest memories is going to see her one weekend shortly after she retired from the phone company.
And of course I remember Port Arthur and the significance it held for her, my dad, and Aunt Susie.
I remember the trips to see Mack and Norman and Jack and Helen. They’re all together now, just like the good old days.
I remember Helen’s Jailhouse Rolls…
I remember how she used to come over to our house for lunch and then leave in the middle of the afternoon “before it gets too dark.”
I remember how when she would call the house you knew it was Grandma on the other line because you would immediately hear, “What’s goin’ on?”
I remember how much she loved her grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
I remember my last day with Grandma.
I remember her commenting on wonderful it was to have the whole family together.
I remember giving her a hug goodbye and how she gave me a light kiss on the cheek.
I remember thinking as I walked out of the room that it would be the last time I was going to see her.
I remember going to church with Grandma when I stayed with her.
I remember the singing, the clapping, and the dancing. I remember she liked it there and that it gave her comfort.
I KNOW that she’s in a better place now.
I KNOW that she’s smiling, seeing us all here together.
I KNOW that she’s happy that she’s with her loved ones in heaven.
I KNOW that she now knows the true meaning of the 23rd Psalm:
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.
Amen and goodbye (for now): Murylene… Mother… Mama… Grandma.
